Gluttony is a sin, I know this.
There is said to be a distinction between being knowledgeable, applying wisdom, and having understanding. When I take the bite filled with “why?” my mind cycles; rotating thoughts of directions right or left – not centered or aligned. To be aligned and centered, to me, is maintaining freedom as far as arms will stretch like eagles wings.
I am seeking The Most High Yah. And in turning from my wicked ways comes relinquishing overeating. Eating leaven to stuff down emotions from days not going as planned, arguments or conflict occurring, self-sabotaging, and more seems easier than sitting in what I am feeling at the time. I believe someone once said comatose is the feeling gained from such eating habits.
How are habits shaken? Doing something different is the buzz in the streets.
As a mother, wife, sister, daughter, and friend, I pray to lead and follow by example. Sis told me today, “you have the mind to do better. . . to repent.” She explained how our hurt leaves an impression, but it is up to us to not operate like we are still living in pain. #ThankYah for eyes to see and wanting to learn ways to breakthrough and grow myself while inspiring those I love.
It is a journey, family. This is my journey and I am owning it.
Furthermore, eating cape cod chips in front of our daughter while she ate a cucumber was a wrenched feeling. Zion’ah is and will look to us as an example of how she should live her life. Again, Thank You Yahuah for placing Your Ruach in Terrence for us to return to Scripture because among many lessons, I am understanding why we must train a child up in the way they shall go.
We have always believed Zi is sent to us from The Most High, who are we not to prepare our daughter to return to where she came from, with prayers to be worthy enough to enter, too. My belief is we are elevating, as my husband says. I know this to be true as we learn and apply accountability for one another. Being responsible for self and each other is key as we are indeed a mirror of the other, reflecting each other. I am thankful because we know each other’s weaknesses, so we can bring one another strength. For instance, My Love decides to treat me to a chia smoothie instead of a burger and fries considering those were my choices yesterday.
Terrence told me about a word he’s learning about in Proverbs that relates to being sluggish or lazy. There is so much wisdom and guidance in Scripture! Reading Ecclesiasticus has reinforced my will to fast and pray to honestly purge.
What am I purging? Demons. I have been under demonic attack since I was a child. My father passed away when I was 7 and since then, or even before, I was said to have mood swings. Growing up as a teen I had anger issues and into my adulthood folks and myself would label and question me as bi-polar.
This past Shabbat we had a lesson about demonic spirits and how to recognize and fight them. It was brought to my attention that my mental illness is not to be categorized (diagnosed) and treated. My mental illness is a sign that I am and have been tormented by evil spirits still roaming on earth since the flood. With this hard revelation I have decided to commit to fasting, a request Yah made some time ago of me that I tip-toed around. Seeing how these demons are diligently and skillfully working to infiltrate my life is a wake-up call. I will not allow myself to be attacked anymore and I refuse to have these demonic spirits around my family. Period!
Thus, the purge has begun. As a former gluttonous, I am watching my food intake because having disciple and control over what and when I eat will strengthen my armor. I am waking in the morning to read scripture and meditate, and before I get too sleepy I am reading scripture at night. First wake I envision the whole body of armor placed piece by piece on me as stated in Ephesians 6:10-18.
I can no longer comfort eat because I can no longer comfort the beast within. It is time I go on a diet, so I can holler “Die It! Devil, get your hands off me! I am Yah’s property!” It is about more than food, it is about discipline and obedience.
How can going on a purge help you in your life? Share you comments below. We are in this spiritual war together.